What Will You Gain This Year??

On my way to work the other day, I heard a radio advertisement that started out with a woman saying something like- "This year, I don't want to lose weight." That got my attention pretty fast!! ... You don't hear that very often, especially around this time of the year! Out of curiosity I kept listening and the ad continued on, while the actress re-stated the same objective (not wanting to lose weight)-- just in different ways. Then she said, "This year, I will gain ten fingers, and ten toes." I was a little taken aback by that, but once I realized that this was an ad for a local fertility/reproductive center at a local hospital I laughed and understood!! I think what I liked about this ad was that it focused not on losing something about ourselves in the New Year but on gaining or adding something to ourselves in the New Year. And I don't mean weight!! 

I think at this time of the year ("diet season") when it's so easy to get caught up in the latest diet fads, celebrity 'diet tricks and secrets', resolutions to drop X number of pounds...  it's helpful to consider instead what we might GAIN in this new year. Now, again... I am not talking about weight in all of this. :) What I am talking about is what we might add to our lives, what we might gain in experiences, perspective, knowledge, faith, love, etc.. Consider 2011 as an opportunity to grow, to do new things, to add meaning to your life in new ways. Rather than having resolutions or goals that reinforce unhealthy beliefs or behaviors, think about putting your energy into positive things that will enrich your life and will enable you to pursue your dreams and aspirations. Growing in health might certainly be one of those goals, and that is fantastic. Remember above all what it means to be healthy!! Health is more than just a physical state, it is a mental, emotional, and spiritual state as well. Be mindful and aware of your goals and how you approach them- Are your goals adding something beneficial to your life? Are you growing in knowledge of yourself and others?  Do you have any accountability or support in your life to help you pursue your goals and dreams? Maybe those are some questions for us all to think about as we move towards our goals this year... ! Happy 2011 everyone! : )

On Giving Thanks...

I can't even believe it is this time of year again... Thanksgiving!! Time flies!! In light of Thanksgiving being very much a 'food' holiday (something that can be anxiety provoking for those who struggle with food), one thing that I think can be helpful is to go back to the basics of what Thanksgiving is truly about! Soo, I asked cha cha where Thanksgiving originated (just kidding!!). No but really, Thanksgiving marks a time when the pilgrims voyaged to America. After a tough year, in which more than a third of those who had come over on the Mayflower died, there had been a very plentiful harvest and so, they commemorated their blessings with a feast. I think along the way, Thanksgiving took on some cultural adaptations- you know, Charlie Brown's Thanksgiving:), but specifically the kinds of food that we consider to be traditional Thanksgiving food (the pilgrims ate more of a traditional English meal).

Anyways, the point is that the pilgrims were celebrating their blessings after a tough year. And while all of us have had different kinds of years- some good, some tough, some both- I think that no matter what our days, weeks, months and year have been like, it is good to set aside time to be thankful!! There is always something to be thankful for : ) This year has been a year of change for me with going out on my own in private practice. And I am so thankful for all that this change and this year have brought. I am thankful for health, family, a job that I love, and people in my life that I love. I am thankful that I woke up this morning, I am thankful that there is a roof over my head, I am thankful that my body functions as it was created to. I am thankful for Peace that surpasses all understanding, I am thankful for sunshine, I am thankful for the hope that I have in days to come. : )

What are you thankful for this year??

Fat Talk Free Week is Here!

Fat Talk Free Week is happening this week. What does this mean?? Well, if you scroll down, the last few posts that I have written have been geared towards Fat Talk Free Week! This is a week set aside each year by Delta Delta Delta to raise awareness and promote healthy body image. The idea is that by making an intentional focus throughout the week not to 'fat talk' we might encourage ourselves and each other to think more positively, have a better self image, and not put a negative focus on our bodies.

So, what exactly is 'fat talk'???

"My butt looks huge!"

"My jeans are too tight!"

"You look really good, have you lost weight?"

"I look so gross today."

"I need to work out double today since I ate that piece of cake yesterday."

"I wish I could wear a size (---)"

"I need to lose 10 lbs."

These are just a few examples-- I am sure you can think of others that you say or have heard others say. I think we are pretty desensitized to 'fat talk' and for that reason, I think just becoming more aware of its presence and trying to eliminate it could bring about a huge and positive change- not just for us but for those around us too. Consider how your words have an impact on others-- when we say these disparaging remarks about ourselves in the presence of others, we are not just shaming ourselves- we are shaming others! It is difficult not to influence others when we speak negatively about our bodies or choices with food or the size of our jeans- so even if it is just out of respect for others, be kind to yourself! Try it this week and see how it feels! : )

On Asking For Help-- And A Horse Named Dude

Last week, I took a little road trip to Virginia where I attended an onsite visit at Remuda Ranch. Remuda is a residential treatment facility for girls and women with eating disorders- they just recently updated their website, and it's worth checking out (follow this link to view it!). Anyways, while I knew quite a bit about Remuda Ranch before visiting, I was really impressed with the quality of care that they provide to patients. I was also impressed with the commitment and value placed on spiritual healing as well! Remuda's treatment program is centered around a Christian approach, however, girls and women of all faiths are respected and welcome and can decide how little or how much they want to participate and interact with the faith piece.

Anyways, Remuda really is a ranch- it's not just called that:-). There is a full service barn complete with horses. No cell phone service, no Starbucks, and nothing but dirt roads and beautiful scenery. Among the therapeutic activities used with patients is equine therapy, which uses experiences and interactions with horses to teach the patients things about themselves, facilitating insight and growth. I was a little skeptical before I really knew anything about it, but after learning more and seeing different demonstrations, it is amazing how much you can learn about yourself from a horse!

I volunteered to help out with an activity and got to meet Dude, an Arabian horse:-). My task was to get him over a jumping bar without touching him. Last time I checked, I wasn't a horse trainer-- and I had NO idea how to make this happen. Once I was in the ring with Dude, I secretly regretted volunteering because I was feeling a little in over my head!! After several frustrating minutes of Dude eating dirt and ignoring my commands to jump over the bar, I finally asked Dave, the man in charge, if he had any suggestions! He didn't (of course), but some of the other therapists that were watching were able to give me some ideas. They told me to take the bar off of the jumping post, and lay it on the ground and have Dude walk over the bar. After much coaxing and guiding him from behind, Dude finally stepped over the bar!!

After processing what happened with Dude (I love that the horse's name is Dude, by the way), Dave mentioned that this particular activity can be useful in illustrating how important it is to ask for help!! He said that he will watch people struggling with an activity like this, not knowing what to do, and watching them get frustrated (like me!), and angry- and yet they don't ask for help. Or, if they do, they wait a really long time before asking. You might see how this applies to eating disorder recovery, and even more so, life!! We were not created to be alone, to have no support or community in our lives. And yet sometimes our pride or life circumstances keep us from reaching out and asking for help! Sometimes admitting we need help and are unable to do things on our own can be a huge step forward... and what a relief to know that we don't have to carry a burden all on our own! Sometimes we don't ask for help because we're not even sure of what we need! But just being able to share a burden with a friend, family member or loved one can be a way of reaching out for help and support.

A History of Our Bodies and Beauty

One thing I have been thinking about lately is trends. They come and go, but while a trend is hot, a majority of people (not everyone, but a lot of people) follow whatever is popular- whether it be a clothing style, accessories (silly bandz anyone?), music, a book or author, electronics, etc. Just an FYI- I'm not knocking on following trends, because let's face it, I'm blogging :)

But as I have been thinking about trends, one thing that has really hit home is the way that 'beauty' and our bodies have been subjected to trends over time. For example, in the early 1900's, Victorian women wore corsets (pictured to the left) in order to make their waists appear smaller for the expressed purpose of accentuating their hips and butt, and to give them the illusion of being rounder and fuller. 20 years later, flapper girls were binding their breasts and working to achieve a boyish figure, thin and straight. 30 years later in the 1950's, Marilyn Monroe was THE icon of beauty. It surprises many people that she was a size 16. She had curves, and her body was the ideal.

It is important to note, as an aside, that throughout the shifts in trends with bodies and beauty, most of us women have tried hard to emulate them, no matter how radical the shift. Case in point, only 10 years later, Twiggy, the super skinny model (hence the name Twiggy) was all the rage and people wanted to look just like her! While thinness and weight loss have continued to be trends since that time, the 1980's were a time in which being fit and toned was considered ideal (Jane Fonda anyone?). When the 1990's rolled around, Baywatch Babe Pamela Anderson was a global icon- she was skinny with huge boobs, which became a major trend in the 90's. If you look around now, the majority of these 'looks' or 'ideals' seem to be outdated, meaning they are no longer in style. How do our bodies and beauty go out of style?

One thing that I have been thinking about is the sheer absurdity of our natural bodies (and how we define beauty) as being defined by trends. Surely, fashions change, and how we wear our makeup and clothes, etc, will change. But I think that we must learn to accept our bodies as they are, and celebrate them as they are because otherwise, we will have a relationship with our bodies that forces us to adapt and change with the trends, meaning we are never able to accept ourselves as we are. The only way for us to feel beautiful is to change ourselves. When the trends begin to change, we must change in order to accept and like ourselves and our bodies. That just seems backwards. It doesn't mean that we all don't ever play into the dynamic of trends, but I think that in considering the history of beauty and our bodies, we may see that beauty is something that goes way deeper, and cannot be defined by trends. If the ideal of beauty is changing every 10, 20, 30 years, maybe we should at least consider defining beauty in ways that don't change. It might help us be more confident, it might help us to accept ourselves and consequently, really love who we are! Think about it, and see what you come up with. Would love to hear your thoughts!

**(History/facts taken from thesite.org)

Update: Another Pro-Ana Slogan, Snack Factory?! Really?

If you didn't get a chance to check out my last post, scroll down and check it out... The Snack Factory, a company based out of San Francisco that makes different snack foods, recently began an ad campaign for their pretzel thin pretzel snacks by using a pro-anorexic advertisement. As you can see from the ad that is pictured in the post below (or you can click here to view it), this was a very offensive ad and the Snack Factory agreed to take it down. Well, believe it or not, this image to the left is what they replaced it with... "Tastes as good as skinny feels." Umm.... Hello!!! How is this any better than the previous one?? Are they just really that clueless or do they not care what the ad communicates?

I am going to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that they are just really ignorant- but I think this again just highlights the need for a) more education and information to the general public about eating disorders and b) the need for continued advocacy and awareness being raised which may eventually help to change things like this that we see and encounter from day to day. It doesn't mean grand gestures. Maybe it means reading up on eating disorders (follow this link for great info on the NEDA site), encouraging your friends (and yourself!) to avoid fat talk, or maybe you point out myths about eating disorders when you have the opportunity! No matter what you do, there is nothing too small to help raise awareness. Every little bit counts.

I'm not sure if these ads are still up; I have not been able to find anything more on whether the Snack Factory pulled them or not. Hopefully they did. Please feel free to contact them and tell you how you feel about their ads if you are so inclined. Here is the link to their website and contact info!

One Woman's Thoughts on Barbie...

I grew up playing with Barbies- cutting their hair, putting real make-up on them, and dressing them up in all kinds of crazy outfits. I actually used to force my brother to play Barbies with me sometimes when we were little and we would argue over who got to drive the Barbie corvette or the Barbie volvo- sorry Jonathan to out you like this. I was a bossy kid and I didn't like playing Barbies by myself! : ) Because of my history of playing with Barbies as a kid, I wouldn't say that I am a hater. But I would by no means say that I am a fan. The sort of global impact that Barbie has had on the self-esteems and body images of women everywhere is not to be overlooked. Let's just take a minute and look at the following facts about Barbie..

Barbie, the best selling fashion doll in the world, has unattainable and unhealthy body proportions. If she were alive, she would be unable to menstruate. Research has shown that very young girls (ages 5-7) who are exposed to Barbie have lower self esteem and want a thinner body than they have.(Dittmar, Halliwell, & Ive, 2006)

While statistics vary depending on which source you use, Barbie's dimensions (if she were alive) would be somewhere around the following- she would be 6 feet tall, 100 lbs., and wearing a size 4. Her measurements would be 39"/19"/33" and as a result would have to walk on all fours because her body's dimensions would not allow her to stand upright (Statistics taken from Eating Disorders Info and ANRED).

Does playing with Barbies cause eating disorders? No way. If that were the case, we'd all have developed eating disorders. But I believe that the way in which we view our bodies and beauty has probably been shaped by Barbie, a pop cultural icon, in some capacity. Interestingly enough, the story of how Barbie came to be might surprise you. It really surprised me. Dr. Susan Albers who has written some great books on mindful eating wrote a piece in the Huffington Post recently entitled "Why I Don't Hate Barbie Anymore." She shares about the life of Ruth Handler, the woman who created Barbie. Handler, the youngest of her 10 siblings, was raised by her eldest sister. She wanted to make something of herself and be successful in spite of the odds and circumstances stacked against her. Handler found worth, value and self-esteem in her work. She even went on to create prosthetics for breast cancer survivors who had lost their breasts to cancer- sadly, she was one of these women.

This article (as well as the book written about Handler's life) provides some very interesting context and thoughts on Barbie, her legacy and the woman behind the doll, as well as a GREAT message on self-esteem and where we each find our value. I would really encourage you to check it out (here!). Let me be clear- in the words of Dr. Albers- "Barbie's negative symbolism and impact on body image clearly overshadows the rest of this story." I can't do this piece justice in my description of it, so I would encourage you to read it for yourself (here). I know I am always encouraging you all to check out different articles, but if you read just one, read this one! What a great reminder that our value and worth as people come from more than our achievements and 'success.'

A Diet is a Diet is a Diet

Lately I've been ragging on celebrities- Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Love Hewitt, and now... Jessica Simpson. I've written about Jessica Simpson in the past (here and here) because she has been involved in many efforts to encourage women to examine what real beauty is, both through her show, Price of Beauty, and through her work with Operation Smile. She was also on Oprah a few months ago, sharing her thoughts about beauty, body image, and her renewed sense of self. At one point, she got teary-eyed and when Oprah asked her what she was feeling, she responded that she was frustrated by the pressure put on women by the media to be thin.

Well, this week, Simpson posted on twitter that she has started a strict vegan diet. While she later added that this diet has nothing to do with weight loss, and only has to do with being healthy, I was a little disappointed and surprised that after her campaign to focus on health, beauty and accepting her body, that she would publicly discuss her 'strict vegan diet' that she says 'shocked her system.' Because she has made body image and beauty her platform, it seems irresponsible of her to mention her latest fad restrictive vegan diet. Diets, as I have preached and preached about, are ineffective and BAD (why? find out here). If Simpson chooses to follow a vegan diet, that is her choice, but to announce that she has started a new diet puts the focus in the wrong place, whether this diet has to do with weight loss or not. Some may disagree with me, and that is ok! But I think that it would be better if she kept that information to herself, especially due to her history of engaging in fad and yo-yo diets and the ongoing scrutiny over her weight- as anyone hearing about her latest diet would naturally assume it has to do with weight loss (as all of her other diets have been in the past).

Our society is obsessed with dieting, who is eating what, losing weight fast, bodies, etc. It's tough to go onto facebook or twitter anymore without reading a status update or tweet about some kind of disordered behaviors/thoughts regarding food and exercise. I'm not calling anyone out here or thinking of certain people as I write this (well, maybe Jessica haha), but the more we call attention to these things, the more we are playing into the unhealthy dynamic created by the media. As much as Jessica Simpson has experienced criticism and pressure from the media, I would think that she would not want to perpetuate the focus and value on such things herself. I am afraid that by making a public point to share her latest diet plan, she is compromising the stance she has been trying to model with health and beauty. It's not that all of her progress and encouragement to women has been completely wasted and forgotten, but she is sending some pretty mixed messages. From here on out, it might be more helpful for her to refrain from promoting or discussing her current meal plan. And so should everyone else. We don't need a play by play via facebook or twitter about how many pounds you lost last week or how fat you feel or how intense your exercise routine is or how you can fit into your skinny jeans again. Food nourishes our bodies, it gives us energy and fuel to think well and be active. Let's keep the focus there and spend the rest of our energy, time and thoughts on things that matter more, like family, friends, our careers, and making the world a better place.

The Joy Project

Help those suffering from eating disorders by voting for the Joy Project in Pepsi's Refresh Project! Pepsi has organized this project as an opportunity for people, businesses and non-profits to share ideas that will make a positive impact on communities. Anyone can submit an idea, as well as vote! And, there are only 2 days left to vote before they start a new month over and , so if you are interested, you may want to check it out soon!! The Joy Project is currently ranked #64 and needs some more votes (quickly) if they are going to receive some funding!!

The Joy Project is seeking 25k to fund a program called Roots of Recovery- the money is being used to rent a meeting space to conduct their meetings and activities, as well as fund the activities and meetings! They are not providing therapy or nutrition services, and are not licensed clinicians. However, they are interested in providing support, education and research- all things that are needed in the field of eating disorders! If you are interested in finding out more about the Joy Project (or voting), follow this link. To check our the Joy Project's website, follow this link.

EDNOS

I have posted in the past (here) about 'eating disorders not otherwise specified' -- commonly referred to as EDNOS. As a diagnosis, EDNOS is not very specific-- if one does not meet the criteria for anorexia or bulimia, then he or she is lumped into the EDNOS diagnosis. In this way, it can sometimes be seen as the 'kitchen sink' diagnosis. This can be problematic for many reasons-- mainly, a single diagnosis used for people that experience a range of different behavioral symptoms (binge eating- no purging, purging- no bingeing, night eating, etc) is not necessarily effective when it comes to treating the eating disorder. There was an article published in the NY Times awhile back that I have been meaning to post that you can access by following this link which addresses this very issue. I would encourage you all to check this article out! It helps to bust a few common eating disorder myths and provides a little more background on EDNOS. For more info on EDNOS, follow this link.

Some of you may have heard about the t- shirt that Urban Outfitters recently pulled from their online catalogue after much hate mail was received. The shirt said 'Eat Less' and was featured on a waif-y model. It is hard to believe that they actually went there! But they did, and while it may have been to generate some publicity (tacky, much?), enough people protested that they thankfully took it off of their website. I also heard that the shirt has been pulled from stores--so hopefully that is true!

A couple of my therapist friends who I got to know while doing some contract work at the Carolina House brought an awesome article to my attention that I just have to share. Below is this article that was published in Durham's Independent Weekly newspaper and written by Rebekah L. Cowell (follow this link to see the article) about some local women who are in recovery and working towards exposing myths about eating disorders that this t-shirt's message was perpetuating.

Amy Lambert used to tell herself what Urban Outfitters is telling millions of other young women: Eat Less.

It wasn't unusual for Lambert, who had an eating disorder for more than eight years, to consume little more than one container of yogurt in a day. Now recovering, Lambert led a protest last week outside of Urban Outfitters at Southpoint mall in Durham.

Last week, Urban Outfitters placed in their online catalogue a gray V-neck T-shirt worn by a rail-like young woman. On the front, in script, the words "Eat Less."

"Urban Outfitters targets a young demographic, and they are reinforcing the idea that eating disorders are a choice, not an illness," she said.

Four other women from a Durham Eating Disorder Support Group joined the peaceful protest, brandishing signs that read, "Messages Can Re-Enforce Deadly Beliefs" and distributing fliers titled "Messages in Media: 'Eat Less' is Humor That's Not Funny."

Mall security shut down the protest 30 minutes later.

"We want to make it a friendly family environment," said Public Safety Officer Sellers, who refused to disclose her first name. "We can't just have people here doing that [protesting and handing out literature]."

Urban Outfitters did not return the Indy's calls or e-mails regarding the ad campaign, but after national outcry the T-shirt was removed from the chain's website, though the shirts that have already been shipped will be in stores. When the Indy visited the store and asked for the T-shirt, it was not on the sales floor. An employee who didn't want to be named called the slogan "harsh."

At least 24 million Americans suffer from eating disorders, which have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness. Twenty percent of people with an eating disorder will die prematurely from complications related to their disease. Telling an individual with an eating disorder to "eat less" aggravates emotional, psychological and physical issues. And for those still stuck in dangerous patterns, it is a message of validation, says Chase Bannister, clinical director for Carolina House.

In fact, the T-shirt has been posted on "pro-anorexia" sites as a source of "thinspiration."

"The banner-statement 'Eat Less' can be a stinging trigger for women and men with anorexia, bulimia or binge-eating disorder," Bannister added, "ultimately providing reinforcement for the distorted belief our patients work so hard to stamp out: 'I will never be okay unless I'm thin.'

The women said by holding the protest, they sought to empower themselves and spread a message of acceptance for a healthy body. Sandy Yarnall had anorexia for more than half of her life. She finally received treatment in 2008. "I struggle every day with wanting to go back to a very unhealthy size, and where I was before recovery, and seeing that message did distress me."

Rebecca Clemins has had an eating disorder for 25 years. "Urban Outfitters put this tee on a waif-like model, which enforces the idea that being waif-like is preferred, and they are encouraging a lifestyle that is killing young women," she said.

"I can't imagine endorsing something that creates so much misery," said Carson Hadley, who developed her eating disorder in eighth grade. She had to drop out of high school during her senior year to get in-patient treatment at Carolina House. "That shirt reminded of what I can't be if I want to live."

I am so proud of the women who participated in this protest, shared their stories, fought to raise awareness and exposed myths about eating disorders. This can certainly be an inspiring act for those with eating disorders who are working towards health to see- that not only is recovery very possible, but that it can also be empowering to take a stand and work towards educating people about the truth about eating disorders.

Jenni Schaefer on Recovery

It's been a busy few days for me and it's time for bed, but I read a great piece today on eating disorder recovery written by Jenni Schaefer that I want to point you all to! It is a pretty challenging read for those of you who may be contemplating giving up your eating disorder, for those of you who are in recovery, and for everyone in between. Follow this link to check it out, or see below for a copy/pasted version.

Eating Disorder Recovery: Easier On The Other Side

If you are waiting for recovery to be easy, pull up a chair. You will be waiting for a long time. Ed (aka “eating disorder”) will gladly sit by your side and wait with you. To sabotage your success, Ed will even act like he supports certain aspects of your recovery.

If you like to read, Ed will say, “Just read this book about recovery, and you will be fine.” He will let you read the book, and congratulate you on doing it, but he won’t let you follow any of the guidance inside that will actually help you.

If you enjoy being around people, Ed will say, “Go to that therapy group, and get some help there.” Ed will let you go to the group, and may even let you participate, but he won’t let you talk about what you really need to talk about in order to heal.

If you like to surf the Internet, Ed will say, “Here’s a great website for you. Go ahead and join the online recovery forum.” He will let you join the online forum, and he will convince you that logging on is more important than eating.

Books, groups, and online resources can all be very helpful tools in your recovery. Just remember that recovery takes full commitment and real action. Real action is not simply opening a book, walking into a group room, or logging onto some website.

If you read a book about recovery, fully commit to the ideas in it that will make a difference in your life, not just the things that are easy to do. If you are in group therapy, talk about the issues that, deep inside, you know you need to discuss. If you are active in an online recovery community, use the positive support from online pals to hold yourself accountable to taking real action in your recovery. It’s not enough to just look at the tools—you really do have to use them.

Real action means drastic change. It also means realizing that Ed will sit by your side and try to sabotage you every step of the way. Ed will even use content from recovery books, groups, and websites to try to fuel his cause. Be aware of this and guard against it, and do what the books, groups, and websites suggest that is pro-recovery. Now that’s action.

The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says, “Half measures availed us nothing.” If you only do eating disorder recovery half way, at most, you will get a half way recovery from your eating disorder. In my experience, you won’t even get that.

During early recovery, I believed that insight would inspire change. I thought that if I just knew enough about eating disorders, and understood myself, I would get better. I learned as much as I could from all of the resources available to me, and I waited for a magical change. I waited for the urge to binge to just go away. I waited to fall in love with my body. I waited for my fear of food to simply subside. And Ed waited right along with me.

I waited. I waited, and I waited some more. I would still be waiting today if intense pain had not pushed me into taking some real action. In my personal experience, pain and discomfort have most often been the motivating factors to get me to change. (For the record, I don’t think it has to be this way. That is why I write about my experiences. I hope that other people won’t have to reach the same level of pain I did before making changes.)

In my recovery, taking action meant tackling the food directly. I stopped purging after bingeing. I also did my best to not binge, which meant tolerating uncomfortable feelings (to say the very least). I ate without restricting. My body changed accordingly, and I felt awful. I felt so bad that I told my mom many times that I would rather be dead than to live that way any longer. I hated the way my body was changing, and I hated how it made me feel inside even more. I felt like a different person entirely --- someone I didn’t know or like. I felt trapped.

When we fully commit to recovery, we are signing up for hurt. Full commitment means we no longer make decisions based on how we feel in the short run (turning to Ed for immediate gratification), but instead we make decisions based on our long-term goals of health and a full recovery. In the beginning, success can actually feel fat and miserable. So stop waiting for things to be easy and start looking for the hard part. Tackling the difficult, ironically, is when the “easy” will find you. If you push through the pain and move all the way to the other side, you won’t have to keep facing the same hurt over and over again. You will be well on your way to freedom.

Life is, in fact, much easier on the other side of the eating disorder. I am not afraid of food, I don’t get the urge to binge, and I love my body. Yes, I said “love”! Today success feels strong and joyful, no longer fat and miserable. I can’t wait for you to get to this point, too.

And you can’t afford to wait either! So, stop waiting and start changing.

Appointed to the Ambassador Council of the National Eating Disorders Association, Jenni Schaefer is a singer/songwriter, speaker, and author of Life Without Ed and Goodbye Ed, Hello Me. She is a consultant with the Center For Change in Orem, Utah. For more information, visit www.jennischaefer.com.

The FREED Act

There used to be a character on Saturday Night Live named Stuart Smalley, who was the host of a fake self-help show (pictured above-haha). I never really watched it because I was young when it was on, but I have seen highlights of it on different SNL highlight shows. Anyways, the character in this sketch is obsessed with twelve-step programs, and is involved in a number of them. He isn't a trained therapist, just someone who is trying to overcome his own addictions and help others on this same journey. His famous line, as you can see from the picture above, is something that he would look in the mirror and repeat to himself as a positive affirmation: "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and doggone it, people like me!" He had many catchphrases that poked fun at 'psychobabble' and self-help lingo. He even turned this sketch into a movie called Stuart Saves His Family--I had to watch it for a class once and write a paper on it :-).

Anyways, in an ironic twist of fate, Al Franken, who played the role of Stuart Smalley, is known also for his political work- he is currently a senator in the state of Minnesota and is advocating for eating disorders! Amy Klobuchar, also a Minnesotan senator, and Tom Harkin, a senator from Iowa, have teamed up to introduce a new bill which Franken is sponsoring. This bill is called the FREED Act (Federal Response to Eliminate Eating Disorders) and it's goal is to "allocate research money to the National Institutes of Health to better investigate the causes of eating disorders and improve treatment methods. The research would also seek to improve public data on eating disorders, including morbidity and mortality rates." This quote was taken from an article published in The Minnesota Daily and the article in its entirety can be read here. The gist though is summarized in a quote Franken gave to the paper- he said, "We don't know nearly enough about diagnosing, treating and preventing these diseases. [This] legislation is a major step forward in understanding eating disorders and how to stop them from destroying lives."

To put things into perspective, the NIH (National Institutes of Health) allows $1.20 towards research per person with an eating disorder, contrasted with $159 towards research per person with someone who has schizophrenia (whose prevalence is significantly less). That is pretty staggering!! Last week was lobby day for the Eating Disorders Coalition, and this was an exciting day for eating disorder advocacy! I have no political agenda that I push when I write my blog- however, I think it is important for us to know the facts and to be educated, and to be able to act if we feel moved to do so! To read more on this act and what it aims to do, follow this link. If you are interested in finding out how YOU can advocate for increased eating disorder funding for research, prevention and treatment, follow this link to write to your Congressperson!

20 Ways to Love Your Body

I have been preparing for a presentation on eating disorders that I will be giving tomorrow at a local high school, so I have been scouring the NEDA website looking for cool ideas, stats and other things to make my presentation non-boring to high school students (who are probably going to think I'm old and boring anyways- JK!!). Anyways, while I was scanning some of NEDA's resources online, I came across a list of '20 Ways to Love Your Body' compiled by Margo Maine, PhD that I thought some of you might enjoy reading! I am just going to copy and paste it below (with my additions in italics:)), or, you can also follow this link and check it out on NEDA's site.

20 Ways to Love Your Body by Margo Maine

1. Think of your body as the vehicle to your dreams. Honor it. Respect it. Fuel it.

2. Create a list of all the things your body lets you do. Read it and add to it often.

3. Become aware of what your body can do each day. Remember it is the instrument of your life, not just an ornament.

4. Create a list of people you admire: people who have contributed to your life, your community, or the world. Consider whether their appearance was important to their success and accomplishments.

5. Walk with your head held high, supported by confidence in yourself as a person [who is made by God and created beautifully!].

6. Don't let your weight or shape keep you from activities that you enjoy.

7. Wear comfortable clothes that you like, that express your personal style, and that feel good to your body.

8. Count your blessings, not your blemishes.

9. Think about all the things you could accomplish with the time and energy you currently spend worrying about your body and appearance. Try one!

10. Be your body's friend and supporter, not its enemy.

11. Consider this: your skin replaces itself once a month, your stomach lining every five days, your liver ever six weeks, and your skeleton every three months. Your body is extraordinary--begin to respect and appreciate it.

12. Every morning when you wake up, thank your body for resting and rejuvenating itself so you can enjoy the day.

13. Every evening when you go to bed, tell your body how much you appreciate what it has allowed you to do throughout the day.

14. Find a method of exercise that you enjoy and do it regularly. Don't exercise to lose weight (or punish yourself because of what you have eaten) or to fight your body. Do it to make your body healthy and strong and because it makes you feel good. Exercise for the three F's: fun, fitness, and friendship.

15. Think back to a time when you felt good about your body. Tell yourself you can feel like that again, even in this body at this age.

16. Keep a list of 10 positive things about yourself (and look at it!)--without mentioning your appearance. Add to it!

17. Put a sign on each of your mirrors saying, "I'm beautiful inside and out."

18. Choose to find the beauty in the world and in yourself (because it is all around).

19. Start saying to yourself, "Life is too short to waste my time hating my body this way."

20. Eat when you are hungry. Rest when you are tired. Surround yourself with people that remind you of your inner strength and beauty.

Some of these may resonate with you more than others- I really appreciated number 4 and number 8. Gratitude is SO important; being thankful and having perspective can go a long way. Hopefully this list provides you with a few things to think about and some helpful pointers to start appreciating and loving your body! :)

Bring Change 2 Mind

I just started watching a TV show recently called Modern Family. It is hilarious. I've only seen it a few times, so I'm not sure I can do the premise justice, but it's essentially a sitcom that chronicles different members of an extended family and their interactions. (If you're curious, follow this link to check it out.) Anyways, I really do like it, but last week when I was watching, one of the characters made a joke about eating disorders. It's hard to explain what happened since I don't really know any of the characters names, but one of the children was annoyed with his mother and said- "mom, go tend to your eating disorder or something." I'm not sure if this was supposed to be funny, but after the day I had, I was NOT laughing. An eating disorder is a mental illness, and there's nothing funny about that. I didn't turn off the TV and refuse to watch the rest of the episode, but it just struck me that if you replaced 'eating disorder' with any other mental illness- say, schizophrenia- it probably wouldn't be funny either. So why did someone think making a joke about an eating disorder would be funny? This just reminded me that eating disorders aren't widely viewed as psychiatric illness yet.

I think one of the biggest myths about eating disorders is that they are a lifestyle choice- not a mental illness. Yes, there is choice involved in recovery- you have to choose to take steps to recover. But an eating disorder is a mental illness, so it's not as simple as 'just eating'. Glenn Close, the actress famously known for playing Cruella Deville in 101 Dalmatians (ha ha, just kidding- I think she is famous for her role in Fatal Attraction, which I've never seen-- and some other movies too..), started a non-profit called Bring Change 2 Mind. The mission is to raise awareness about mental illness, to work towards de-stigmatizing it while also providing support for those who deal with mental illness. Close's sister and nephew, who both suffer from different mental illnesses, were the inspiration that fueled her to initiate this endeavor. PsychCentral wrote a little article awhile back in October when it launched - to read it, click HERE.

I'd encourage you to check out her site! I'll be honest- right now, there is a slightly annoying pop-up when you access the site, but that's just because Bring Change 2 Mind recently partnered with NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) for NAMIWalks Campaign (a walking campaign to raise money for and awareness of mental illness!). The pop-up is a video, and even though it's slightly annoying, it's actually worth watching :) Once you get past the video, the site is great- there are resources for those who want to learn about mental illness or find support if they are struggling with one, there are videos of people sharing their stories, and there is additional information available that serves to encourage real understanding of mental illness! Right now, eating disorders are not part of their featured mental illnesses- they feature depression, post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), bipolar, and schizophrenia. However, there are many mental illnesses, eating disorders included, that will hopefully be added as their non-profit grows! At this point, what seems important is that this is an organization that is dedicated to promoting awareness and knowledge about mental illness to de-stigmatize... which is awesome. If you are interested in finding out how you can be involved in any capacity, you can check out the 'be involved' tab on their site!

Happy Independence Day!!

July 4th is one of my favorite holidays- I LOVE summer, fireworks, watermelon, and sunny days at the beach. I fully realize, however, that today is March 13 and we are not rapidly approaching July 4th at this point. Why do I even bring up July 4th?? Well, it is the day when we typically celebrate 'independence.' But I started thinking recently that while we celebrate independence collectively as a nation, it is not as common that we individually celebrate our personal independence from struggles or things that have held us back in the past-- or perhaps even from things that we are currently struggling with still that are holding us back. I'm not necessarily talking about making a big public declaration, or throwing a big party to celebrate your independence (if that is what you want to do though, go for it! haha). But personally acknowledging and having a fixed time set aside that exists to remind you and reflect on such a decision can provide great meaning and purpose. I have heard, as I'm sure many of you have, of people marking their days of sobriety- and that is surely a form of commemorating a momentous decision to turn from alcohol or another substance. While (like I said) I am not necessarily suggesting we release fireworks to mark our independence from something, I think that acknowledging the surrender that takes place with such a decision is important and worth remembering and reflecting on.

My intention in writing this post about independence, as weird as it might sound, is to encourage you to consider having an independence day for yourself. What exactly do I mean by this? Well, I think that we all go through things in our lives. I write a lot about body image and eating disorders, but there are certainly other struggles that exist out there as well that you may face!! Whether it is an eating disorder or body image issue, an unhealthy relationship that you find yourself struggling to get out of, an unhealthy habit that seems to control you, dependence on alcohol or an illicit substance, or something else, I think it is SO important to commemorate your decision to turn from whatever it is that is holding you back and is keeping you from being FREE so that you are able to use it as a means of pushing ahead. Of course, we don't all have a specific date or a specific time to commemorate moments like these and that is okay- because turning from an unhealthy behavior or a way of thinking can be a gradual process. The point is that having a specific date isn't necessary. What seems important (to me) is the heart behind this, which is that we are acknowledging a surrender of our will and are choosing to move forward from a certain point on. Surrender does not mean that we don't slip and sometimes fall back into old ways of thinking or acting- but surrender keeps us moving forward as we look ahead to a goal or a way of life that we strive to maintain.

Do you find that you stare at yourself in every reflection, mirror, store window, etc that you walk past, obsessively checking yourself out to make sure you look ok?? Do you feel like you need someone else (a friend, a boyfriend, a husband, a parent, your child, etc) to validate your worth?? Do you feel like you need to be a certain size or weight to be happy?? Do you feel that you need a certain food/drink/drug to feel alive or satisfied?? Are you constantly doubting yourself or being critical of yourself?? Any way of thinking or acting that keeps you from being free is a way of thinking or acting that is not only not helpful for you but serves to keep you in bondage. To start by simply acknowledging and becoming aware of such captivity is the first step. Making a decision to 'be free' is not as easy as it sounds, and requires diligence, faith and hard work!! For some of us, we need more support to experience freedom- whether that is with the help of a friend, a pastor, or a counselor, to walk through that process with.

I would encourage you to consider if anything (person, place, thing) is holding you back in your life and what may be keeping you from becoming the person you were created to be. There is no better way to live than in freedom!! Walter Conkrite said that "there is no such thing as a little freedom. Either you are all free, or you are not free." Sounds pretty obvious, right? Well, if that is the case... and if there is anything that is keeping you from being 'all free' than I would challenge you to take an action step forward- no matter how big or small.

**As an aside, I want to be clear that if you have an eating disorder, simply stating freedom from your ED does not usually make it go away-- and this is not what I am suggesting will happen if you declare a fight against your ED. An eating disorder is a mental illness, and as such, cannot just be wished away. However, your will in fighting your ED is soo important. Maybe your declaration of independence from your ED begins with pursuing professional help, or seeking the level of care that is appropriate and advised for you by a health professional. Or perhaps it means being committed to the recovery process. Whatever this action step may look like, I want to make sure that I am clear on this point! :)

Figure Skating and Eating Disorders

There was a period of time (maybe in high school?) when I enjoyed watching figure skating. My mom has always liked watching it, so when I went to go hang out with her the other day, it didn't surprise me to find her curled up on the couch watching it. Anyways, I watched with her for awhile, but truthfully, I cringe when I watch skating because I just hate seeing the girls fall- and it seems like they all fall!! I have such a difficult time enjoying it because it seems like they work for hours and hours and years and years training, they miss their proms, and sacrifice having 'normal' lives, and one fall or misstep can dictate their futures. I know that is slightly dramatic of me to say. However, in a competitive situation like this, a tenth of a point can determine whether or not one will go to the Olympics after having trained for years. I just can't take the pressure!! Haha. Anyways, all that to say- it's been a looong time since I've watched any skating. And what I noticed as I watched was that this time around I was cringing for different reasons. If you have read my blog before, you probably know what is coming... but I was upset by how many of the skaters looked unhealthy. Because I sit with people on a daily basis who are in the middle of some pretty serious battles with eating disorders and body image issues, I see what they go through and know how difficult and distressing it can be. The fact that many competitive skaters likely struggle with eating disorders may not be a newsflash, but it is still very, very sad and concerning.

As in all sports, the body is a major instrument; a few sports in particular though (think gymnastics, running, skating) feature the body as the only instrument. In many of these sports and activities, the rates of eating disorders are soaring. The percentage of skaters with eating disorders is very high. A recent estimate stated that upwards of 85% of competitive figure skaters have eating disorders- that is a LOT. Jenny Kirk, a former competitive (and successful) figure skater, was interviewed recently by the Huffington Post and she did a great two part interview to raise awareness about eating disorders and their prevalence in skating. She shares her personal story, which involved leaving competitive skating due to the severity of her eating disorder. She is now in recovery and attending college, while also raising awareness about eating disorders. The interviews are very informative and interesting. Check them out by clicking below!

**Jenny Kirk interview part 1

**Jenny Kirk interview part 2

Mixed Messages and Making Moves..

This morning, I read a really thought provoking blog entry on True/Slant (which is a blogazine--kind of like a magazine, but a blog... umm, i might have made up that word!!). The author, Katie Drummond, was discussing Katherine McPhee's recent bikini cover on Shape magazine. McPhee, who gained fame after appearing on American Idol, has publicly discussed her past struggles with bulimia, and her experience of being admitted to treatment for three months prior to going on the show in order to focus on getting healthy. Ms. Drummond takes aim at Shape Magazine for putting a recovered eating disorder patient clad in a bikini (and airbrushed!) on its cover, as well as at McPhee for posing in a bikini and perpetuating unrealistic images of beauty after struggling herself with feeling pressure as a result of viewing similar unrealistic images in the media. Ms. Drummond's article is entitled A Lesson in Health Hypocrisy and she explores the hypocrisy that exists in this scenario. Her blog entry is a little angsty, but I appreciate the passion with which she writes because I think that by posing in a bikini for a magazine which happens to advertise 'drop a pound by Friday' on its cover, McPhee- and Shape- are sending some pretty mixed messages.

I wonder if McPhee, or Shape, or the media in general realize the impact that they are having on women by sending such mixed messages. I am not pointing the finger at McPhee (well, maybe I am a little), but she says in the article that doing six different 'moves' changed her body. This sets an alarm off to me. It's not that exercising is wrong, or trying to be healthy or fit is wrong, but it concerns me that her happiness and acceptance of her body are a result of the changes she has made to her body. It just sends the wrong message to women about where our happiness comes from. Again, the point is not to bash McPhee. I just think it is important to raise awareness and discuss some of these things that we become numb to, because whether we know it or not, these images impact us! While there is not one single cause of eating disorders, and while seeing unrealistic images of women's bodies do not cause eating disorders, these images can be a precipitating factor, when combined with a genetic predisposition and certain environmental factors.

A month from now, NEDA (the National Eating Disorder Association) is sponsoring National Eating Disorders Awareness Week--- February 21-27. I will be posting more information as this week draws nearer, but I wanted to mention it in light of what I read this morning on True/Slant. Rather than just venting about the media and that magazine cover, or discussing how things could or should be different, it is helpful to think forwardly and focus on what we can do to make some changes! One simple thing that I have mentioned before is using GoodSearch! This is a search engine, just like google, that donates money to nonprofits of your choice before you perform each search. You can donate to eating disorder nonprofits, as well as a bunch of other great organizations. Follow this link to find out more. The second thing that I wanted to mention is something that I read on NEDA's website the other day. Marilyn Wann, author of Fat? So!, developed an art activity for people to participate in that deals with transforming the numbers on scales to adjectives! Confused? The Boulder Youth Body Alliance (BYBA), a nonprofit that seeks to encourage teens to change the world, rather than their bodies, has encouraged teens to participate in this activity by turning scales into art. I love this idea and think it must be really empowering for women of all ages to take part in something like this! Follow this link to view pictures/examples of scales as art, and to read more about what BYBA is doing!